You want real & empathetic leadership? Look for this one key pronoun to find out.
Let's face it. We are different. Very different. In. So. Many. Ways. And leadership abilities run the gamut.
Consistently, however, we all seem to want empathetic leadership and in the eternal search for it, we have made serious mistakes. Nothing can delay progress more than a weak, egocentric leader. And nothing can kill ambition and inspiration faster than un-empathetic leader.
So, let us try to vet leaders in better ways. And let us aim to find those that have empathy and that wish for others to succeed beyond themselves.
Yeah, I know, hard in today's world. They are out there, however.
There is one very simple test that we can start with. It is so simple is laughable. In my experience doing business across multiple cultures, this one pronoun will consistently reveal the truth about where a leader is in the empathetic, ego-less scale.
That pronoun is: I
Someone many years ago suggested trying to write everything without using "I." It is hard. Very hard. In a self-referential and "look at me culture" it is even harder. Try it. It will lead you to a new awareness. I promise.
During the process of assessing prospective leaders, we need to be hyper-tuned with how they utilize this pronoun. One simple question that will reveal someone proclivities in a zepto second is this one:
"Please describe a project team that you managed and describe how you accomplished what you set out to accomplish."
For a powerful follow up. Ask the following:
"Please describe a project that you managed and describe why you were not able to accomplish what you intended to accomplish."
Then compare how the person uses "I" in those two questions. Did they use I to claim success and not so much when success was not evident? How did he/she start answering the question. Did they use I to start? Or did he/she start with painting a picture and providing context of a group setting and how they worked, etc.
I think you get the gist.
It is not about the I's. It is about the We's, the Us's and the Our's...
So, there you go. Have fun.
Consistently, however, we all seem to want empathetic leadership and in the eternal search for it, we have made serious mistakes. Nothing can delay progress more than a weak, egocentric leader. And nothing can kill ambition and inspiration faster than un-empathetic leader.
So, let us try to vet leaders in better ways. And let us aim to find those that have empathy and that wish for others to succeed beyond themselves.
Yeah, I know, hard in today's world. They are out there, however.
There is one very simple test that we can start with. It is so simple is laughable. In my experience doing business across multiple cultures, this one pronoun will consistently reveal the truth about where a leader is in the empathetic, ego-less scale.
That pronoun is: I
Someone many years ago suggested trying to write everything without using "I." It is hard. Very hard. In a self-referential and "look at me culture" it is even harder. Try it. It will lead you to a new awareness. I promise.
During the process of assessing prospective leaders, we need to be hyper-tuned with how they utilize this pronoun. One simple question that will reveal someone proclivities in a zepto second is this one:
"Please describe a project team that you managed and describe how you accomplished what you set out to accomplish."
For a powerful follow up. Ask the following:
"Please describe a project that you managed and describe why you were not able to accomplish what you intended to accomplish."
Then compare how the person uses "I" in those two questions. Did they use I to claim success and not so much when success was not evident? How did he/she start answering the question. Did they use I to start? Or did he/she start with painting a picture and providing context of a group setting and how they worked, etc.
I think you get the gist.
It is not about the I's. It is about the We's, the Us's and the Our's...
So, there you go. Have fun.
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